Friday, February 4, 2005

Wow, you look fantastic today

I've always thought about ways to say things, to either completely insult someone, or ways to charm someone without making it like I was trying to do so. Or ways to convince someone to do something for me without saying so. Anyway, in class we learned about introject - to incorporate into one's own psyche unconsciously !(too Psychologic !) Such as, say you say to someone: "I like your shirt!" That person could take it objectively, and say "thanks" and deep down, think: "mental note: this is a nice shirt". Or that person could take it subjectively, and say "thanks" and deep down, think: "omg, i'm gonna burn this shirt" Or if you said "Wow, you look fantastic today." One person may focus on the word "fantastic", but another person might focus on the word "today". It's easy to laugh about things like this. Nowadays, I couldn't care less. Some might say that clothing and appearance is TOO far down my list of priorities. For me ...it's not. I was just thinking to myself, how can I go and compliment someone without the fear that I completely insult them? How can I say something to someone without offending them, or internalizing what I said to them and hating me forever for saying it? Perhaps I can completely throw out the idea of making negative comments or observations. Yes, some people can take criticism, but some might bury it inside and end up jumping off a bridge 10 years down the road. I'm not kidding.. this is serious stuff.